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By: Chinwe Esimai

Self-awareness has been cited as the most important capability for leaders to develop, according to the authors of “How To Become a Better Leader,” which was published in the MIT Sloan Management Review. Successful leaders know where their natural inclinations lie and use this knowledge to boost those inclinations or compensate for them.

Yet self-awareness seems to be in short supply among leaders. While women in executive-level management positions tend to exhibit more self-awareness than men in the same positions, the overall percentages suggest there is much opportunity for growth in this area. In a study of 17,000 individuals worldwide, the Hay Group Research found that 19 percent of women executives interviewed exhibited self-awareness as compared to 4 percent of their male counterparts. Here are some tips on how to be more self-aware

Knowing You

The one constant factor in all your endeavors is you; understanding yourself is therefore paramount.

Dr. Travis Bradberry, author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0describes self-awareness as one of the core components of emotional intelligence. He defines emotional intelligence as your ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself and others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships.

Self-awareness is empowering because it arms you with knowledge and enables you to make better choices — to change or grow. Here are four strategies to increase your self-awareness:

Identify External Factors

Identify what factors, triggers, or indicators – both negative and positive – prompt others’ behaviors toward you. Why do you do the things you do, and how do others respond? How do you respond in turn, and why do you react the way you do? What is the impact of culture on your perspective and others’ perceptions?

Gather Trusted Feedback

Feedback leads to empathy and helps you understand the impact of your actions on others. One of the key indicators of low self-awareness is being unaware of personal blind spots—traits or aspects that may limit the way you act, react, behave, or believe, and in turn, limit your effectiveness.

Consider the Circumstances

Think about when to utilize a personality trait to your advantage and when it’s best to leave it on the sidelines. According to the MIT study, most self-aware CEOs learned to identify their “outlier tendencies” and adjusted their behavior in order to change the way they were perceived. They didn’t undergo an entire personality overhaul; rather, they learned how to be themselves but “with more skill.” The executives considered which business or social situations required their personality traits (for example, extraversion or openness) and which did not.

Assess Behaviors in Light of Your Values and Priorities

Do you observe patterns in your behaviors? Assess those patterns in light of what is important to you, what drives you, and who you want to be. Be honest in assessing competing priorities. Are there tendencies that you’d like to change? Are there factors you’d like to add to the equation? The best outcome of self-awareness is to figure out what makes you great and be more of it. Continually add to that list, refine it, and build on it. Conversely, seek to be less of what negatively impacts you, those around you, and your desired outcomes.

Stay Curious

Our inclinations, fueled by our culture, backgrounds, and experiences, influence who we are, but we are responsible for who we continually become. New circumstances can also create new triggers or lead to different reactions. Stay curious, and don’t stop seeking to understand yourself.

 

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How To Get Good Sleep

By: Centerstone

Sleep is a vital part of every person’s daily routine as it provides a necessary recharge to your body and mind. Good sleep refreshes you, makes you feel more alert, and gives you the energy you need throughout the day. Getting too little sleep will cause you to be less focused and more forgetful.

“Sleep is a necessary mood booster,” says Julie Bailey, Clinical Manager for Centerstone. “You actually process your emotions when you sleep, so getting too little sleep can make you more irritable and stressed.” Good sleep also boosts creativity, which improves self-esteem and productivity and lowers stress.

How long should I sleep?

We all know the golden standard of 8 hours, but is this a healthy expectation? Short answer: mostly yes, for adults. Experts say that 7-9 hours is a healthy daily amount of sleep for adults to get. These numbers increase, however, for younger groups. Teens should get 8-10 hours of sleep, school-age kids 9-12 hours, pre-school-age kids 10-13 hours, and so on.

“These standards for sleep may vary from person to person, as some adults may truly need only 7 hours to function normally, and others need 9 or more,” says Julie Bailey. “But 7 hours of sleep should be the minimum goal for most adults.”

As previously stated, not getting enough sleep dampens your energy and mindfulness. On the other hand, getting too much sleep can do the same. Sleeping too much, say 10 hours a day, can actually make you more depressed. Depression also makes you more tired, making you want to sleep more, thus causing a vicious cycle.

While the length of time you spend asleep is important, so is the quality of your sleep. The sleep cycle works in several stages, and sleep is best when you go through each stage. Therefore, what you do before bed matters, as staying asleep helps ensure you go through each stage.

Optimizing sleep

Fortunately, there are several methods experts recommend for getting good sleep. Below are several recommendations to help you optimize your sleep.

  • Keep it consistent. It is much easier to achieve regular sleep when you set a good rhythm for yourself. Establish a sleep routine, going to bed and waking up simultaneously every day. The longer you do this, the easier it will be, and the better you will feel!
  • Turn off your screens. The light from your phone, computer, and TV screens negatively impacts your brain’s melatonin levels, disrupting sleep. This, and the stimulation from watching your favorite shows, make falling asleep harder. If you do need help falling asleep, instead try listening to relaxing music, an audiobook, or sleep stories to help soothe you to sleep.
  • Manage your nighttime routine. What you do before bed matters. In the hours before bed, you should avoid caffeine, nicotine, sugar, and alcohol, as they all either make it harder to fall asleep or disrupt your sleep once it has already started. Avoid exercising too soon before bed, as it will take time for your body to cool down. Control light, decreasing it throughout the evening to more naturally get tired.
  • Don’t psych yourself out. If you are worried that you will have trouble falling asleep, you likely will. This concern becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of difficulty sleeping. To take the pressure off yourself, approach sleep from a mindset of relaxing and unwinding rather than just trying to fall asleep.
  • Manage your stress. If you don’t manage your stress during the day, it will follow you into the night, making it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep. If you choose to tackle your problems instead of ignoring them, you will both fall asleep and wake up the next morning more peacefully.
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By: Centerstone

There are a multitude of reasons that people find themselves stressed in their daily life. Some points of stress are situational, or they can be more general—like family, work, school, and personal relationships. Stress can be overwhelming to endure alone, and without helpful ways of managing it, it can create havoc in the mind and body.

Stress is a biochemical reaction to something that creates tension—whether that is emotional or physical. When we experience stress, our brain goes on “high alert” as it prepares our body to respond to whatever situation is at hand. In these moments, our body begins a complex process, part of which is to release hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, essentially preparing the body to fight, flee, or freeze. While this process can be lifesaving in truly dangerous situations, experiencing this stress reaction on an ongoing basis can have detrimental health consequences.

The responses caused by stress are normal and can be very useful. Stress helps us do well on tests or perform well at work. Stress helps us slam on the brakes when a car in front of us stops suddenly. However, stress can also cause physical, emotional, cognitive, and behavioral difficulties including nausea, racing thoughts, inconsistent sleep, anxiety, panic attacks, and difficulty concentrating.

If stress goes unaddressed it can lead to serious health issues like obesity, substance use disorder, heart disease, high blood pressure, and diabetes. It is extremely important to monitor the responses you are having to stress and find ways to better manage them. If you are experiencing symptoms of stress, try using these practices to help:

  • Setting boundaries. Create reasonable boundaries to help with self-preservation. Say “no” when you feel overwhelmed. Keep your mental health in mind, and open up conversations with family, friends, and even coworkers about what you can or can’t manage.
  • Practicing mindfulness. Be present in your surroundings. Be aware and know what makes you happy. Do something for the sake of making you happy that has no other purpose involved. Read the novel, play the videogame, and watch the TV show—make yourself feel comfortable and at ease.
  • Choose your environment. Connect with people—be intentional with your environment. Have people around that can make you feel capable of doing anything! Encouragement is a great tool for dealing with stress.
  • Be kind to yourself. Remember that you are a human, and there is only so much you can do. Give yourself grace and your brain a break. Understand that there are many people in similarly stressful situations.

Once you begin to eliminate some of the stressors in your life and learn to be patient with your process, then you can begin to manage your stress in more healthy ways. Take the time to connect with others, and understand that the process of eliminating stress is not always easy. If you have tried to better manage your stress, but find you are still struggling, it may be time to reach out to a mental health professional.  They can provide more tools on how to manage your stress and healthy tips for coping.

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Five Principles of Productive People

By: Centerstone

Do you feel like you are always busy but never get anything done? Many of us lead hectic and often stressful lives. There is always something to accomplish. Some days we are ready to complete a long to-do list. Other days we would rather spend hours on the couch.

Productivity takes effort, and it is well worth it in the long run. Follow these tips to simplify your life while improving productivity.

Be Aware: Busy Does Not Equal Productive

Sometimes multitasking can destroy productivity. Being busy, or trying to maintain an appearance of being busy, has nothing to do with productivity or authentic accomplishment. Just because you’re getting something done doesn’t mean it matters. Focus on the purpose of your tasks, one task at a time. Productivity is about meeting your goals, not just scratching things off your to-do list.

We often believe that completing tasks will make us happy, but the constant desire to finish things can actually produce feelings of anxiety. Remember that life is about the journey. Enjoy the challenge of the path. Break the multitasking habit by practicing mindfulness.

Be Specific: Identify Goals vs. Tasks  

It’s easy to confuse goals and tasks, and that confusion can lead to feelings of overwhelming pressure. It is vital to have a doable to-do list. It’s easy to get stuck if everything on your to-do list seems daunting. The purpose of a list is to capture actionable items or pre-defined tasks you will accomplish. Tasks are small steps that lead you closer to meeting your goals.

Perhaps your goal is to lose two pounds this week. Tasks will help you achieve that goal. Developing a meal plan, visiting the grocery store, and exercising each day are all tasks that will help you accomplish your objective. Break down large problems by focusing on small steps to help you reach your goal. Focus on tasks that give you the most return on your time investment and you will become more productive. Goals are very important, but having too many may cause you to lose focus, and you’ll end up not accomplishing any of them.

Be Smart: Organize and Prioritize

To be organized you must be aware of where your time is going. Create a time log and use it to analyze and summarize all your daily activities for a given week. Once you know the gaps in your productivity, you can build a new daily routine.

Categorize and prioritize your tasks. List your pre-planned activities in order of importance. These are the tasks you would complete in a day without interruptions. Next, list all unplanned tasks. This list includes incoming calls, instant messages, and requests from others. Unplanned tasks are usually part of most days and need to be processed continuously.

Be Intentional: Procrastination Robs Your Power

What tasks are you thinking of putting off until tomorrow? What projects have you started but can’t seem to finish? Are there items on your to-do list that roll over week after week? Procrastination is one of our biggest energy drainers. It’s easy to convince ourselves that life is more pleasant when we avoid things we don’t want to do. But instead, it adds stress, disorganization, failure, and guilt.

Procrastination can also cause missed deadlines, lost opportunities, tardiness, unnecessary expenses, and even health and medical problems. By overcoming procrastination habits you’ll gain a sense of energy and enthusiasm triggered by completing tasks.

Be Truthful: Admit Your Excuses

Evaluate what else is wasting your time. Self-generated time-wasters include disorganization, the inability to say no, gossiping, perfectionism, lack of delegation, and what is commonly known as the “paralysis of analysis.”

Sometimes we think too much about the same issue. Progress is delayed because we are thinking about the same thing over and over again. There are better ways to use your energy. Don’t waste time and energy repetitively thinking about something without finding a real solution.

Lastly, there can be such a thing as too much time management. Like laundry, a to-do list will never be completely done. The key is to be satisfied by your accomplishments of the day, even though you will never fully complete your to-do lists.

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The Mental Health Benefits of Exercise

By: Lawrence Robinson, Jeanne Segal, Ph.D., and Melinda Smith, M.A.

You already know that exercise is good for your body. But did you know it can also boost your mood, improve your sleep, and help you deal with depression, anxiety, stress, and more?

What are the mental health benefits of exercise?

Exercise is not just about aerobic capacity and muscle size. Sure, exercise can improve your physical health and your physique, trim your waistline, improve your sex life, and even add years to your life. But that’s not what motivates most people to stay active.

People who exercise regularly tend to do so because it gives them an enormous sense of well-being. They feel more energetic throughout the day, sleep better at night, have sharper memories, and feel more relaxed and positive about themselves and their lives. And it’s also a powerful medicine for many common mental health challenges.

Regular exercise can have a profoundly positive impact on depression, anxiety, and ADHD. It also relieves stress, improves memory, helps you sleep better, and boosts your overall mood. And you don’t have to be a fitness fanatic to reap the benefits. Research indicates that modest amounts of exercise can make a real difference. No matter your age or fitness level, you can learn to use exercise as a powerful tool to deal with mental health problems, improve your energy and outlook, and get more out of life.

Exercise and depression

Studies show that exercise can treat mild to moderate depression as effectively as antidepressant medication—but without the side-effects, of course. As one example, a recent study done by the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health found that running for 15 minutes a day or walking for an hour reduces the risk of major depression by 26%. In addition to relieving depression symptoms, research also shows that maintaining an exercise schedule can prevent you from relapsing.

Exercise is a powerful depression fighter for several reasons. Most importantly, it promotes all kinds of changes in the brain, including neural growth, reduced inflammation, and new activity patterns that promote feelings of calm and well-being. It also releases endorphins, powerful chemicals in your brain that energize your spirits and make you feel good. Finally, exercise can also serve as a distraction, allowing you to find some quiet time to break out of the cycle of negative thoughts that feed depression.

Exercise and anxiety

Exercise is a natural and effective anti-anxiety treatment. It relieves tension and stress, boosts physical and mental energy, and enhances well-being through the release of endorphins. Anything that gets you moving can help, but you’ll get a bigger benefit if you pay attention instead of zoning out.

Try to notice the sensation of your feet hitting the ground, for example, or the rhythm of your breathing, or the feeling of the wind on your skin. By adding this mindfulness element—really focusing on your body and how it feels as you exercise—you’ll not only improve your physical condition faster, but you may also be able to interrupt the flow of constant worries running through your head.

Exercise and stress

Ever noticed how your body feels when you’re under stress? Your muscles may be tense, especially in your face, neck, and shoulders, leaving you with back or neck pain, or painful headaches. You may feel a tightness in your chest, a pounding pulse, or muscle cramps. You may also experience problems such as insomnia, heartburn, stomachache, diarrhea, or frequent urination. The worry and discomfort of all these physical symptoms can in turn lead to even more stress, creating a vicious cycle between your mind and body.

Exercising is an effective way to break this cycle. As well as releasing endorphins in the brain, physical activity helps to relax the muscles and relieve tension in the body. Since the body and mind are so closely linked, when your body feels better so, too, will your mind.

Exercise and ADHD

Exercising regularly is one of the easiest and most effective ways to reduce the symptoms of ADHD and improve concentration, motivation, memory, and mood. Physical activity immediately boosts the brain’s dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin levels—all of which affect focus and attention. In this way, exercise works in much the same way as ADHD medications such as Ritalin and Adderall.

Exercise and PTSD and trauma

Evidence suggests that by really focusing on your body and how it feels as you exercise, you can actually help your nervous system become “unstuck” and begin to move out of the immobilization stress response that characterizes PTSD or trauma. Instead of allowing your mind to wander, pay close attention to the physical sensations in your joints and muscles, even your insides as your body moves. Exercises that involve cross movement and that engage both arms and legs—such as walking (especially in sand), running, swimming, weight training, or dancing—are some of your best choices.

Outdoor activities like hiking, sailing, mountain biking, rock climbing, whitewater rafting, and skiing (downhill and cross-country) have also been shown to reduce the symptoms of PTSD.

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Setting Goals and Keeping it Real

By: Centerstone

At a year’s end or beginning, many of us sit down and reflect on the past year, what’s to come, and how we can make positive changes for the next 12 months. Whether you want to quit smoking, read more, or learn a new skill, setting goals can be helpful stepping stones to achieving your desired life. Goals, however, can be hard to maintain for long periods. In fact, a 2022 Time Magazine study found that only 8% of people stick to their goals and resolutions for an entire year.  One challenge in fully executing our goals may be because they aren’t always realistic for us.

Why setting realistic goals is important, and how to know what’s realistic for you.

Realistic goals are more likely to keep you on track than larger, loftier goals. With a realistic goal, your chances for success and completion are higher which encourages continued, more sustainable improvement and progress.

Figuring out what is realistic for you may require some trial and error. What we think is realistic may not be, so having some flexibility is helpful. “Give yourself space to experiment and learn where you currently sit with your goal,” says Jenna Farmer-Brackett, Manager of Clinical Training at Centerstone.

Common pitfalls of goal setting and how to navigate them.

  1. Not having a clear ‘why’ for wanting to achieve it. Sometimes, wanting to achieve something for the benefit or approval of someone else can make the goal seem like a chore, rather than something that motivates you.
  2. Not taking time to celebrate victories. “Whether you track your progress in a journal, or have an accountability partner, keeping track of your progress toward your goal can help see it through,” adds Farmer-Brackett. “The key here is to celebrate all the victories and progress along the way!”
  3. You are taking on too much. When you stick to fewer, more meaningful goals, it’s easier to track progress and stay with it throughout the year, or your designated timeline.
  4. You’re taking an all-or-nothing approach. If you don’t hit your first benchmark right away, re-focus and re-asses your goal. It’s important to remember that goals can change as we do.
  5. Not taking time to prepare. It can be harder to achieve goals without a specific plan in place to help you get there.

How to break up larger goals into smaller, more attainable ones.

To hit that milestone, it can be helpful to break it into smaller, more attainable goals in order to see progress sooner which ultimately will help with motivation. Keep the following steps in mind when looking at the big picture:

  1. Define your goal, and make it as specific as possible.
  2. Identify key milestones and identify the smaller, more attainable goals. Consider any major steps that need to be taken to reach your end goal, and create sub-goals that will help you achieve them.
  3. List tasks for each of the smaller, more attainable goals. Figure out what you need to do each day or week to keep you on track for the big picture.
  4. Prioritize and plan. Prioritize tasks based on the impact of achieving the overall goal.
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By: Centerstone

Building and maintaining friendships can sometimes mean navigating feelings of jealousy and/or envy. While the two words are often used interchangeably, they are different. Envy is the painful feeling of wanting what someone else has, like personal attributes or possessions. Jealousy means to feel threatened, protective, or fearful of losing your position or situation (friend status, job, promotion, etc.) to someone else.

Even among the closest of friends, these emotions can sneak in, creating tension and putting distance between those we care about. To maintain healthy friendships, it’s important to understand where jealousy comes from and learn effective ways to deal with it.

Here are some practical ways to identify if jealousy or envy are invading your friendships and some tips on how to handle it with care.

Why do friends experience jealousy?

Jealousy in friendships can arise when we worry that we’re not quite measuring up, or worrying about being left out or replaced. Sometimes, it’s about the fear of missing out, especially if we see friends spending time together without us. Envy can arise when we begin to compare ourselves to a friend’s achievements or possessions, like a great job or a supportive family. It’s natural to think, “I wish I had what they have.”

Emily Brault, a Team Leader at Centerstone, reminds us, “We often think the grass is greener on the other side without realizing the effort it takes to nurture what we have. It’s crucial to focus on how we can contribute to our relationships and, importantly, how we can take care of ourselves to be the best friend we can be.” Making a deliberate choice to stop comparing ourselves to others and practicing gratitude for what we have can often prevent us from spiraling into jealousy and envy.

What if you’re the jealous friend?

Jealousy is often rooted in not feeling good enough about ourselves. Working to strengthen our sense of self-worth and confidence, we can begin to experience these feelings from a new perspective, leading to a stronger sense of self. According to Brault, “The first step is recognizing and acknowledging your feelings. Do this by asking yourself, ‘Where are these feelings coming from?’ and ‘What situations make me feel jealous?’”

What if your friend is jealous of you?

If you notice signs that a friend may be feeling jealous, it is completely appropriate and usually helpful to talk about it directly, but be gentle as you approach it.

  • Start by sharing what you value in your friendship,
  • Then mention the behaviors you’ve observed – be specific.
  • Depending on how the person responds to the conversation, you might need to set some boundaries to maintain a healthy friendship.
  • Moving forward, open and honest communication is key.

How to preserve a friendship when jealousy is present

  • Being open and honest about your feelings is crucial for keeping a friendship strong.
  • If it’s tough to bring up, try writing down your thoughts, practicing what you want to say, or seeking advice from someone you trust.
  • Sharing your feelings can improve understanding and strengthen the bond between you and your friend by building trust, respect, and empathy.
  • Dealing with jealousy means understanding each other, communicating openly, and showing empathy.
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By: Centerstone

Sometimes, it can feel like much of what we see or read on local or world news is negative. With humanitarian crises, civil rights issues, and natural disasters happening almost daily, the constant stream of bad news can significantly impact our mental health. “It increases our stress and anxiety, and decreases our ability to care for ourselves and regulate our emotions,” says Kelly Bombardiere, Vice President, of Enterprise & 988 Crisis Services. Though the 24-hour news cycle is never-ending, there are a few ways to help cope with what we see and hear.

  1. Limit your news consumption. Though we can get news from almost anywhere, there are ways to avoid it when you don’t want to see it. “Unfollow news outlets, or mute their notifications. This way, you’re able to control when you receive news,” adds Bombardiere. It may also be helpful to allocate a set amount of time each day or week to catch up on the news. If you do this you can still stay up-to-date without feeling overwhelmed.
  2. Get accurate news. When consuming news online, it can be hard to tell what’s true. Before sharing an article or post with friends and family, make sure to validate the source of the piece to avoid spreading misinformation.
  3. Follow positive news outlets. Online outlets like @goodnews_movement on Instagram or sites like Good News Network share positive news and uplifting stories from all over the world that may help bring light to your day.
  4. Focus on you. Consistent exposure to negative news can be overwhelming and can cause us to feel swept up in current events that don’t directly involve us. If the news brings feelings of negativity or stress, do something that allows you to step away from it and brings you joy. “There isn’t a set go-to list for this, it is truly as simple as doing something that makes you happy,” adds Bombardiere. Whether you take a bubble bath, listen to your favorite song, or practice yoga, distracting yourself with something positive can help alleviate feelings of being overwhelmed.
  5. Practice gratitude. Keeping bad news in perspective when we feel like there isn’t anything we can to do help can be challenging and can often bring feelings of helplessness. However, it’s important to try to focus on the good that surrounds us and try to use that to help others. Consider getting involved with an organization that supports a cause you’re passionate about. Whether you donate goods, time, or money, you are making a difference.
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Feeling the L-O-V-E for Me!

By: Centerstone

Self-love. It’s a concept we may hear a lot about, but what does it mean? Simply stated, self-love involves our mindset and attitude about ourselves. It’s how we talk to ourselves and embrace our positive characteristics along with things that we might see as flaws. Self-love also involves being able to see the ways that we’ve grown and the ways we want to keep growing.

The difference between self-love and self-care

“Self-care is action-based ways that we take care of our health and wellness, and self-love is our mindset and our feelings towards ourselves,” says Brittany McCrady, Licensed Clinical Social Worker at Centerstone. The two terms are sometimes used interchangeably, but they are separate practicesHowever, when we engage in those self-care actions, we are fostering love because we’re taking care of ourselves.

Is loving myself the same as being full of myself?

“So much in life is about balance,” McCrady adds, “things can tip towards being egotistical or being full of yourself when you are excessively inserting yourself, or talking about yourself in a context when it isn’t necessary and, in turn, you aren’t able to be present for someone else.”

We can be confident and believe in ourselves without putting other people down, dismissing others, or believing that we are superior to others. We can want to be the best version of ourselves without thinking we’re better than other people.

Different ways to practice self-love that come from within:

Talk to yourself the way you’d talk to a friend or loved one. Speak to yourself with the same compassion, encouragement, and support that you would for your best friend.

Set boundaries and expectations with others. Show yourself and others that you and your time are valuable by saying “no” to things that don’t prioritize your time or energy.

Recognize challenges you’ve overcome and celebrate achievements. Take the time to intentionally say ‘heck yes, I did that’. Make space to reflect and sit in that accomplishment and give yourself credit for a job well done. Every accomplishment no matter how big or small can be celebrated!

Practice positive affirmations. While affirmations aren’t for everyone, they need to make sense for you if you want them to be effective. Generic affirmations can be ineffective because they may not apply specifically to your goals. For example, instead of saying, ‘I’m a good leader,’ try being more specific and say ‘I create a safe and calm environment for the people that I supervise.’

Choose to surround yourself with positivity. We can work on how we treat ourselves and how we talk to ourselves, but that gets easier when we’re around others and in environments that send us the same types of messages.

Challenges to cultivating self-love

Things happen in life that can impact our inner dialogue. This could be trauma or significant, repeated events that instilled certain messages that can be hard to unlearn. “Some people aren’t starting with a clean slate when it comes to being proud of themselves,” adds McCrady. This could also come from our environment or how we saw our parents, siblings, and friends talking to and about us and themselves. These influences have the power to form how we talk about and see ourselves.

What are the mental health benefits of self-love?

  • Self-love can develop your confidence and resilience. When hard things happen, having confidence and self-assurance can help make it easier to bounce back
  • Improves your self-esteem and overall view of yourself
  • Help you handle stressful situations more easily
  • This can lead to improved relationships with others. When you love yourself, you’re better at loving others
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By: Centerstone

In a world with civil unrest, political disputes, and an endless stream of media, it can be easy for some of us to feel overwhelmed. Maintaining our peace in such a chaotic world can be a challenge, but it is possible and can be done in different ways to best benefit us and our mental health. According to Jayne Tingley, Director of Community Care at Centerstone, inner peace can best be described as balance in all areas of your life, even with the presence of stressors. A large part of achieving and maintaining inner peace is being able to recognize when and where to set boundaries and to accept the things that we cannot control.

Maintaining peace within our lives can be achieved within ourselves, in our homes, or with another person. One sign that your life may be lacking balance and peace is if your stressors are your primary focus. Luckily, there are several ways that we can check in with ourselves, and reclaim our feelings of peace.

  1. Protect your space. Find a space in your home where you feel safe, and allow yourself to feel your feelings and be calm in this space. Whether you find comfort in a special blanket, scented candle, or song, try to surround yourself with these things while in your safe space.
  2. Confide in your people. If your safe space is a person, you may find comfort in knowing that that person is there to listen without judgment. Connect with your people when you feel you need some extra support with managing life’s stressors.
  3. Practice self-care! Self-care looks different for all of us, but it’s important to remember that it does not have to be extreme. “Make sure that every single day you have some time carved out solely focused on meeting your needs,” says Tingley. “Our needs can vary from one day to another, but making sure you have that time is important.” Catching up on your favorite show, treating yourself to your favorite food, or even doing a puzzle are all examples of self-care. Our needs can be met in different ways that work best for us.
  4. Take time for yourself. Whether you take a hike, journal, meditate, or listen to your favorite podcast, finding pockets of peace throughout the day is key.

Another important component of protecting our inner peace is setting boundaries. Learn to say no firmly, but kindly. Know that it’s okay to step away from situations and people that interrupt your peace and that you don’t need justification to do so. If watching or reading the news is a stressor for you, consider changing the channel or reading a book instead. If you had a tough day at work, try to leave those feelings at the door by taking a few deep breaths, and entering your home with good intentions. If you are feeling overwhelmed with different aspects of life, consider taking a walk or calling a friend. Do whatever works best for you at that moment, but try to avoid excessive consumption of substances and screen time.

Practicing self-care and protecting our peace in a chaotic world is crucial. Giving in to certain stressors can be hard to avoid, and can cause feelings of uneasiness and anxiety; however, protecting your peace is possible.

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